Happy New Year!

Hey guys, happy new year! Does anyone have new years' resolutions? I'm not sure what mine are, yet :) hehehe. I'll blog again later, once I have thought about them.

Quote jB: "the joys of an internship. work like it's your job, get paid like a volunteer"

I couldn't agree more!

Merry Christmas!

Er, I don't exactly celebrate Christmas - I just enjoy the sales at malls and the discounts with chocolates ;) Hahahaha. We're having pizza tonight - my younger sister and I. Mom and Dad went to an uncle's house. Elder sister is out with her boyfriend, visiting his family and her friends. *grins* Paktorlogy ;) She asked if I wanted to come along but I declined - you don't expect me to be a lamp post ;)

Hmm, what else is up? I've applied to take Marketing as my free elective. There's some paperwork involved. I'm still considering when to go back to Aust. It would be wise to go back about 5 days earlier or something beacuse 80% of my stuff is scattered at a good friend's garage and IH's garage itself. I need to go locate all these things and unpack. Also, I need to settle down, get used to my new room. Might be a bit tough to just land in today and start second week of class the next day. That's pushing it a bit too far. So, I might go back early. I don't really feel like it, actually. I like my room too much. Yeah, family can be a lot to deal with, but it's still nice.

Hmm, decisons, decisions - something I don't like making. Making a decision is easy but living with it, is hard :)

We're going to Sg. Wang tomorrow. I'm looking for an Indian skirt and a denim skirt. I want a skirt which has some Indian design on it, it has to be three quarter or knee length. I want to wear it with a simple, plain, black or white top, and black calve-high boots ;) Fusion dressing - my new experiment. Hahahaha. I hope I find what I'm looking for.

P/s - That's usually how I shop - I always have what I am looking for in mind. It's rare I buy things without imagining them first ;)

I’m at work now, bored a little. I’ve resorted to taking my iPod and headphones along. It makes the days more bearable. LOL. I’ve been given another assignment (earlier I was researching on open systems and client/server), something related to irrigation and water management. It’s quite interesting but it requires a lot of Internet research. I’m trying to convince my supervising engineer to let me work at home. *grins* I mean, like I’ll go in half the day…because our office (the particular room I work at) has no Internet and I told him it’s not fair of me to plug in an external computer (my laptop) into the office’s official network, at the other office. Besides, I don’t even know anyone at that office, it’ll be hard to work there. So, apart from sitting here reading articles I saved off the Internet during lunch, I’m not doing much. My funky pair of maroon and red glasses have arrived. They are perfect. Anything you spend a lot of money on is usually perfect. *grumble*

My friends are having exams these few days. I hope their exams are going fine. I can understand how they feel, panicky and stressed up. Keep calm guys, if someone like me can Pass, you guys can definitely Pass. LOL.

I’m considering taking Marketing as one of my free electives next semester. I wonder if its tough. So far, It looks quite interesting and easy ;) I’d love to take an easy subject for once. All this brain-squeezing subjects aren’t too good so far. If I take something easy, I’ll do well and it’ll boost my morale – wouldn’t you agree? So, I wrote to my program coordinator, let’s see what he has to say. *keeps fingers crossed*

King Kong

I watched King Kong. It was nice...I like how they pictured it. Some parts were really scary...but then again I'm chicken so you can't really take my word for it. You guys should watch it though. I so want to watch Corpse Bride. Hmm, maybe I'll just get it off the net :) Save some money. Hehehe.

What Have I Been Up To?

Well, I admit I'm not really doing anything apart from going to work from 8.30 - 5.30. Watching some television programmes, reading some books, daydreaming, planning which date to come back.

It's irritating how the first year after my grandmother's demise (we Indians see the Hindu calendar and it gives you a date which is said to be exactly one year after the person departed...) is falling on March 3rd. I wanted to attend the prayers because I wasn't even here for half of the prayers they had when she passed away. Australia beckoned, remember? Now, Australia beckons, again - university begins, officially, 26 February 2006. I find it annoying. I also wanted to go bug my cousin who's turning 30 on 27th February. She's the mom to the cute kid I always talk about?

So, now I might leave late. Assuming I can get my perfect flight. I have to start booking soon or I won't have a flight. At least that's what my optometrist told me.

Speaking of optometrists, my eyesight has deteriorated. I kept getting headaches but I didn't know why. Then I went and saw my optometrist last Wednesday and he took a new reading for my astigmatism angle and of my short-sightedness (is that even a word?) - turns out, it has deteriorated. He said I'm one of those people with very sensitive astigmastim angles. If my glasses are skewed slightly or bent, I won't be comfortable. Urgh, no, it's not flattering because I had to order a new pair of glasses.

I was hoping that if my glasses were fine, I could order contacts instead. I was kind of jinxed with contacts in Australia - just couldn't agree. My eyes were bloodshot all the time so I exchanged them for a pair of glasses. Now, I can't get contacts. I figured I'd pick a new pair of glasses because when you lack sleep, it's very uncomfortable to wear contact lenses. Glasses are also the best when people like me oversleep and wake up 30 mins just before class. Yeah, I don't seem that type but it happens to the best of us ;)

I am yet to meet up with some friends. Again, it is irritating that I'm doing an internship (unrrelated internship..urgh) which doesn't pay and the list of things I'd like to buy is just too long. I know, I'm greedy. But it's just that sometimes you hold back from buying a lot of things you'd like for a long time, so the list grows. I don't buy much things in Australia because they are expensive. I was sooo hoping to get a lot of things in Malaysia. But then when you're back, reality sets in. You don't earn, so it's not like you have that much money. Yeah, I get a monthly allowance from my parents but still? I'm doing the translation, true enough, but it's a lot of work. Besides, I'm tempted to bail out after I've completed this final booklet. It's tiring, especially when you come home at 5.30 and the person wants it the next day morning or something like that. So I don't get to sleep much. And it affects my concentration at work the next day. Fine, no one there even knows who compuer systems engineers are but I still like to have my image as an energetic, focused person.

I am a bit tempted to work at Australia, now. It's not easy to get a PR and a job, but sometimes it's just nice to have people who understand what you study. It grates at my confidence that no one gets what I study. At least at Australia, people don't give me this whole blank-eyed look. Well, we'll see. Elder sister might be getting married end of next year. I soooo wanted to attend the Christmas sale at Australia. Looks like I can't do that now. I figured I'd do some office clothes shopping before I come back. *grumble* Yeah, I know it's a crappy thing to complain about when your elder sister has found someone she deems worthy of marrying. True. But she wants me to wear a saree for her wedding (I don't like sarees. All those times I wear traditional suits - they are punjabi suits; entirely different stuff.) and her boyfriend's name is just one letter different from mine.

It doesn't really bother me, but it is irritating when other people commment something along the lines of, "Oh! That's his name? Your boyfriend and your sister have the same name?" Gee. Thanks. I'm not male. I hate being thought of as male. That's why I grew my hair. Now people will wonder if my name is unisex. No, it's not. I'm Kavindra and he's KavindraN. Big difference. But yeah, on the other other hand, I am pretty glad my elder sister has found someone. She seems happy. I like her to be happy - she deserves it. She has gone through a few downturns in life and seeing her with her big Corporate Assurance Executive job (mind you, I wrote her resume..hehehe) and getting all dressed up for work (her dressing sense is wonderful...really, she doesn't buy expensive clothes at all but somehow she coordinates her clothing very well), not to mention driving her own car - it's nice.

I'm excited about graduating...but terrified too. My cousin failed two papers last semester and she cannot graduate now. Sounds familiar, something like what my elder sister went through - but she failed one. Still, it's quite bad when you reach your final semester and crap like this happens. I'm scared it will happen to me. So I'm gonna take most of my tough subjects next semester. *keeps fingers crossed* I feel bad for my cousin. We kind of grew up together. She does study hard. I hope she re-takes those two papers and finishes her degree asap.

Yeah, it's been a long post. I know ;) I've been watching lots of episodes - Ghost Whisperer, House (OMG, Foreman is House's boss. That episode was hilarious.), Desperate Hosuewives (is on break till 8th Jan!), Smallville (is getting very boring) and Grey's Anatomy (move over Addison!).

Take care you guys (I know I have less and less readers as the days go by..bad for morale but good for privacy, don't you think?) and I really want to meet all of you before I leave (Shari, Kim( Jap food! ), Bengie, and everyone else who is free!).

Thinking...

Of all the thousands of people who you will meet in your life...
98% of them will never really care about you one way or the other, no matter what you do.
1% of them will hate you for no good reason, no matter what you do.
1% of them will love you for no good reason, no matter what you do.
You shouldn't spend any time trying to figure out why any of these people are the way they are.

-- Qoute NG

House, Again.

I'm blogging while watching House again. I haven't been up to much. The trip up North of Malaysia was so tiring yesterday so I took half a day off today. I went to work before lunch. I'm glad...I so liked having half the day off.

I picked up a pair of shoes...funky grey and turqoise green adidas sneakers ;) It was on sale. I am a bargain person.

I hear MNG's sale starts Thursday. I'm definitely going for it. I remember the last time I picked up somethign at an MNG sale, Kim was with me and she helped me pick out a pair of jeans - it was the double-coloured one some of you have seen me wearing - it's light grey on the front half and the back half is darker grey :)

I attended two wedding dinners during the weekend. They were alright, nothing special. Wedding dinners are getting a little boring, especially if you don't know the bride and groom. There are two more weddings and another wedding dinner. That means I need to buy two more suits (I have two kind of new ones). I don't like shopping for suits, to be honest because I have a weird body shape...doesn't help when people constantly tell you that you're "fat"...so it's just irritating when you try clothing that doesn't fit you. Then again, I always had that problem with most Indian suits - very few of them fit. Usually its because my shoulders are too broad. I'm not proportionate...but I guess it's not the end of the world. Does make you envious of people who are NORMAL-shaped though.

Hmm..

I’m writing this post at work. I’m bored, its 10.18am. I’ve become the office’s emergency typist because there seems to be a lot of work lately and I volunteered yesterday to help my supervising engineer out. It’s quite fun. Engineering correspondence are so to-the-point. They’re brief, they make sense, they use tables instead of lengthy paragraphs. It’s cool 

I take my laptop to work because the firm is actually a very “old school” type of firm. The tables are steel. I haven’t seen a steel table like this in a long time. Compared to the high-tech, first class auditing firm I used to work at, this is very old-fashioned. The clerk cum receptionist uses a computer with Windows 98. *grins* I haven’t seen that fellow in awhile. Oh, guess what’s the worst part (at least for Internet addicts like me) – there’s no Internet at the office where I work. They have two offices in two different buildings. One is the admin side and the one where I work is the actual office. It’s so weird to not have the Internet at my fingertips at all times. I seem to rely on it a lot.

I’m not sure if I’m going to the construction site because the tickets haven’t been confirmed. I wouldn’t mope a single big if I couldn’t go because then I get to have Japanese food with Kim. I am craving Japanese food. House food is nice but I think I’ve kind of lost my taste for food. I just swallow everything as usual, forgetting about taste. Partly because I’m very, very tired but I think it’s also because I don’t have time to “enjoy” my food.

I have to attend a wedding dinner tonight. It’s a wedding dinner of someone I’m not particularly close to, let alone do I utter two words to him. It’s very weird, in large families, where you are related to people whom you don’t really speak to sometimes due to a disagreement, sometimes its just that you don’t click with that individual. We can’t really help it actually, but it’s sad when people don’t make an effort to get to know their relatives. This particular case is a lost cause though, I barely like the guy. He’s supposed to be my “uncle”. I have loads of uncles.

You know what? The more relatives you have, the more people you have to please. The more people you please, the more miserable you feel (you’d think you’d feel better when you please people, but nahhhhh, life doesn’t work that way darling), the more miserable you feel, the more unhappy, drained, distressed you get…then eventually – you just die. LOL. I had to write that. I find it morbidly funny.

Unlike some of my friends who are terrified of death – I have a net pal who gets panic attacks when he thinks of how he will die eventually and not fulfil all the things he wants to do in his life….it’s quite sad. He just can’t get past the fact that it is in his control to get all the things on his to-do list done. Hey, I got over my panic attacks when I used to think of failing subjects. Really, it was bad, but I didn’t want to admit it. But yeah, I think he now realises that he has to change how he thinks and get things done, if he wants to control his panic attacks. He’s a really nice and interesting person to talk to, though; extremely practical and logical – so unlike me. Hehehe. My mind is a spiderweb.

Okay, it’s 10.32am now. I’m going to save this and post it when I get home during lunch ;) Did I mention I go home for lunch everyday? The engineering firm is like 3 minutes drive from my house so my Mom drops me and fetches me back.

// Edit

It’s 3.19pm now. I’m soooooo bored. Somebody get me out of here!  Seriously, I am very, very bored. I don’t have anything to do except for read from books non-stop. Guess what I’m reading? Client/Server and Open Systems - *YAWN* - can’t believe I studied and suffered through computer systems engineering for 3 years so far…to sit here and read Client/Server. Does anyone know how outdated that is? Or how unrelated it is to computer systems engineering? GrRRR. This is irritating. I’m dozing off – way tooo tired. *YAWN*

Mixed Feelings

My whole idea of coming home and taking a break, backfired. I don't like to whine. I like to be the person who accepts everything stoically...the person who knows that nothing in life lasts forever so everything that comes her way is meant to be and is definitely for the better. So, I won't whine (this time). I have a lot of work though. People laugh at how they come by and see me on my laptop everyday. I can't help it. I have to finish this translation work I promised a relative. It's not easy, especially when the duration given is so short and when you're a person who just cannot accept it when you cannot do something. Instead, you just keep pushing yourself. I haven't slept properly for the past few days. I mean seriously, I spend like more than 6 hours a day back in Australia, sitting in front of my laptop. You'd think I'd wnat to get away from it for once, but I can't.

I'm extremely tired I keep nodding off at work (I am sure people have noticed). Well, my internship is just basically me studying civil engineering documents from 8.30am to 5.30pm with 1 hour lunch break in between. I'm goint to visit a construction site this Monday and I'll be back Monday night (had to cancel Japanese dinner plans with Kim :()...yeah, it's fun. I'm just really tired though. It's like I have my internship, the translation work, stuff to do. Feels like "Australia" happening all over again - no room to breathe. Everything just crashes down on me. I want this and I want that but wanting things requires so much sacrifice. Guess whoever said, "to win something you have to lose something", was so right.

The War Has Begun.

Yep, I'm waging a war against *drumroll*....calories :) Yep, I admit. I am fat. Just so hideously fat. Seriously, I cannot believe how I could have put on so much pounds. In Australia, I looked fine. But here, I just look - FAT. Urgh. But, it's okay. I haven't eaten junkfood since I came back. So, I'm gonna eat even less, maybe not eat rice at all and drink more water. Let's hope I lose weight. *keeps fingers crossed*

I'm glad its weekend. The internship drains me out. It's challenging, but a small part of me still wishes it was something more related to computers. It's a civil engineering firm...I get a bit of it because I remember some physics and maths and lots of logic but I just get annoyed when no one there knows what Computer Systems Engineering is. Don't they keep up with the latest degrees? Grr. I'll finish it - the Internship, my degree and all. I know I will...I guess I worry over everything.

I did some shopping lately. Will post pictures soon. Have a great weekend people!

Things Get Better

I got my exam results. I passed all my subjects. I actually scored 4 Passes and 1 Distinction for Maths. Me, a Distinction. Really. Just when I thought I am no longer smart and all my "brains" dried up the night before I left Malaysia for Australia...I actually scored a Distinction.

I started my internship today. It looks tough, I am scared. I don't think I can do it, to be honest. The first half of the day I was positive, then I looked through the stuff they want me to know and I felt a bit...overwhelmed. But that's my main weakness - I get overwhelmed by stuff easily. So I have to fight that overwhelmed feeling and try harder. Right? I'll work at it :)

I finished more translation but I still have more to do. I'm tired. I had 3 hours of sleep because I had to finish the translation I promised to complete. You know how I have this thing for keeping to my words...